watch and listen
In his email he wrote, “I have learned to watch and listen. And respond”. Ah, what a beautiful response. There is wisdom in those words. The best gift to have as an individual is the art of knowing oneself.
It is possible with age, to not acquire maturity, growth and wisdom. There are plenty of older yet immature, insensible, detached, and dull-witted people out there. Wisdom is not granted to us as we grow older, but is given to those who seek it. Remember, I am neither a Bible expert nor a preacher, but it does say in the Bible:
Get wisdom; develop good judgment. Don’t forget my words or turn away from them. Don’t turn your back on wisdom, for she will protect you. Love her, and she will guard you. Getting wisdom is the wisest thing you can do!
I wonder why the Bible refers to wisdom as a woman? We are the nurturers, the more spiritually inclined one’s but that I will leave for another blog…to be continued.
Jim Rohn once said “Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you a fortune.” Granted, I think it is taking me a little longer to graduate from the school of self-education, perhaps that’s why fortune is not here yet. Please, don’t ever mistake this quote as a statement that all rich people are wise. Gosh no…some of them can be pretty foolish.
Some of my friends call me very insightful but I would much rather call myself a person able to read the signs. We surely need to follow the signs if we are to drive from point A to point B. Most pilots, if not all, wouldn’t dare to take off without planning a route. A private pilot planning a flight under VFR will usually use an aeronautical chart of the area that is published specifically for the use of pilots. This map will depict controlled airspace, radio navigation aids and airfield prominently, as well as hazards to flying such as mountains, tall radio masts, etc.
It is imperative to follow signs and learn to understand it’s meaning. It is what I call the primary instinct of survival. It is easy to observe when others are missing the signs or have a lack of common sense. The hard part is to find out when we disregarded the signs in our own life and now have to endure some of the consequences of it.
In my case I disregard the signs and went ahead and married a man that was not romantic like I am, not compassionate like me and on top of it all was verbally abusive. Given, beautiful and incredible kids came out of it, but nevertheless the detour was pricey and lengthy.
The other day I told a friend “you need to get a hold on your anger”. He answered: “Do you think is anger?”. Perhaps I was the one that had anger because his answered made me very annoyed. Smiles. I am guilty of been extremely impatient when people can’t see what I see. I needed to walk away and tell myself…OK they are not on my level of discovery yet. Maybe they will never be… remember we can’t give wisdom; they need to seek it.
I am not sure what is worse-to not know there are signs everywhere that need to be read, physical or emotional, in which your body will indicate that something is wrong and yet, willingly brush it aside simply wishing that everything will turn out OK (which I am guilty of in marrying my ex), or to be so pathetically oblivious to where you are and what you are doing by not ” knowing thyself”. I think the latter is worst. I would rather know of my own craziness instead of be the one that is not even aware of it.
How do we seek wisdom? I think by doing a few things.
– Make time to be quite and alone – to be comfortable with your own feelings and emotions. Make a point to understand how you’re feeling and why. This is an underrated process that takes time.
– Write a journal and reach out to the creator in prayer, thanks and petitions. I find asking to be a great tool. The Bible says, “ask and you shall receive”.
– Do a few sessions of therapy (choose the right one, we are not looking to talk about the problem but we are looking for solutions.)
– Make a decision. I have noticed that the power of intention is what propels us into the next level. Nothing will ever change nor final destinations will ever be reached if we don’t first set an intention to do it.
I started this blog with a comment from my friend in New Zealand: “I have learned to watch and listen. And respond.”
Are we taking the time to watch the birds, to watch how people react to us or interact with us, to watch the snow flakes coming down in a stormy winter day, or to watch how our bodies respond when an abusive person sends us an email? Or to watch how our kids move, talk and walk? Are we truly listening?
To listen is an art. It requires so much more energy to be still and focus on what others are saying without our minds roaming elsewhere. To listen is one of, if not the hardest things to do. It requires observation. It requires our internal emotions to slow down. It requires a level of comfort with silence that only comes from the peace within. I am able to notice when someone is not listening while I am on the phone talking to them. It is easy to pick up the vibes. How many times do we talk while someone is still talking? How many times do we talk just to fill the gap or seek to be busy so that we don’t have to do the inconceivable?
What is the inconceivable you ask? To listen to our own selves and uncovering what is hidden. Good or bad, sorrow or joy.
The mistakes I have made in my life weren’t done for a lack of understanding signs. I was aware that they were all there. I simply failed to seek the wisdom and the courage to at all cost, follow my gut. I can’t change my past nor I can change yours but I can share my story… and just maybe…my story can inspire you to seek wisdom to learn to watch and listen.
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